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Literature Text
Words are but a loss
When your mind
Is on a wander
Dreaming,
Caressing fantasies -
Simple fables,
But do we ever learn?
Love, hatred,
Contrast;
Muse.
We may win,
But we always
Lose.
Recover from mistakes
Repeat, repeat,
End -
Endless cycles
That are
To our routine
And yet,
What are words
But a loss
To wandering minds?
Where they go,
Where they hide -
What they see,
What they felt -
And our muse
Continues,
Always the same
Memory,
But always
A different
Time ~
When your mind
Is on a wander
Dreaming,
Caressing fantasies -
Simple fables,
But do we ever learn?
Love, hatred,
Contrast;
Muse.
We may win,
But we always
Lose.
Recover from mistakes
Repeat, repeat,
End -
Endless cycles
That are
To our routine
And yet,
What are words
But a loss
To wandering minds?
Where they go,
Where they hide -
What they see,
What they felt -
And our muse
Continues,
Always the same
Memory,
But always
A different
Time ~
Literature
On my corner
I stand on my corner
sometimes with a sign
sometimes with my voice
sometimes I don't stand at all
but today I stand,
I stand on my corner
and scream
I scream warnings, tidings
blessings and curse
in the hopes
someone will hear them.
I stand on my corner
and no one walks by
I see no one near
and I cry out
for someone to come
for anyone to help me
to offer me something
even if its just shelter
from the downpour cascading
down my cheeks.
I stand on my corner
and no one stands with me
and the crushing truth of that
forces me to fall.
No one offers me a hand
I have no way to rise
and so I sit on my corner,
sometimes with tears,
sometimes with scr
Literature
...
if i throw myself into the river,
will the rapids take it to the other
side?
or will Charon fish it out of the Styx...
bring me back with his harsh
words...
no coin.
go back.
you can't cheat the
underworld.
go live at the gates of hell;
die, trying to claw your way
through.
[there is no way in... is there not a way out?]
Literature
We see different stars
We see different stars
While yours shine throughout
the darkness of your night,
light the way into your sky,
and hold your wishes til
they finally come true,
mine reflect in the murky filth
from which they can be seen
acting as disgusting mirrors
into a world which cannot be mine
and only remind me
that my home is on the ground.
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The result of not being able to sleep, but finding my poetry journal at two in the morning - yet still feeling uninspired.
So I took not being inspired and made it my inspiration.
Other thoughts would be really appreciated on this piece. Opinions on the subject, feelings towards, and so on.
On a side note, still looking for more deviants who may want to collaborate.
It's nice to have a view into other poets' minds, it might start bringing words back into my own thoughts.
So I took not being inspired and made it my inspiration.
Other thoughts would be really appreciated on this piece. Opinions on the subject, feelings towards, and so on.
On a side note, still looking for more deviants who may want to collaborate.
It's nice to have a view into other poets' minds, it might start bringing words back into my own thoughts.
Comments29
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I am so far behind on critiques for We-Poets, but here I am at last. So sorry for the long delay!
This is one of those kinds of poems I hesitate to critique or change in any way because they flow so simply from the poet. In that sense, you've created a true piece of art that cannot be marred by edits. At the same time, I presume you are open to thoughts anyway, so if I were to edit anything, I might...
Dreaming,
Caressing fantasies -
Simple fables,
But do we ever learn?
***Drop "Dreaming" and keep it a 3-line stanza like the first.
Love, hatred,
Contrast;
Muse.
We may win,
But we always
Lose.
***Could be rewritten this way:
Love, hatred, contrast, muse.
We may win,
But we always lose.
Recover from mistakes
Repeat, repeat,
End -
Endless cycles
That are
To our routine
***Could be rewritten:
Recover from mistakes
Repeat, repeat, end -
Endless cycles our routine
***I'd rewrite the second-to-last stanza this way:
And our muse continues,
Always the same
Memory,
Again, I'm reverent of your poem as-is, but wanted to offer other possible thoughts anyway by way of objective help. Best wishes with it either way!
-Sean
This is one of those kinds of poems I hesitate to critique or change in any way because they flow so simply from the poet. In that sense, you've created a true piece of art that cannot be marred by edits. At the same time, I presume you are open to thoughts anyway, so if I were to edit anything, I might...
Dreaming,
Caressing fantasies -
Simple fables,
But do we ever learn?
***Drop "Dreaming" and keep it a 3-line stanza like the first.
Love, hatred,
Contrast;
Muse.
We may win,
But we always
Lose.
***Could be rewritten this way:
Love, hatred, contrast, muse.
We may win,
But we always lose.
Recover from mistakes
Repeat, repeat,
End -
Endless cycles
That are
To our routine
***Could be rewritten:
Recover from mistakes
Repeat, repeat, end -
Endless cycles our routine
***I'd rewrite the second-to-last stanza this way:
And our muse continues,
Always the same
Memory,
Again, I'm reverent of your poem as-is, but wanted to offer other possible thoughts anyway by way of objective help. Best wishes with it either way!
-Sean