First of all: wow! It's really dark and bloody but it depicts the truth behind a serious bullying situation. The way it keeps switching perspectives between the bully and the bullied really adds a lot of impact because it's like the reader can catch at every moment the thoughts and later the view of both of them. I like how the two characters keep it between them, that's realistic. I know some of this comes from your personal experience (and I'm also familiar with the matter) so I know you wrote it to show the world a serious problem that happens everywhere but only a few can see. Congratulations, in the end this is a great poem overall.
Yeah, this remind me of my own past and what I learned from it. I know what is hidden behind such a poem, how it makes you feel and how it changes you. I hope you're not going through such times anymore
Thank you - I thought that the dual view would bring out a lot more meaning in those two words at the end. Normally, it sounds like just a stereotype we use for bullies defense, that they're "only words". But I tried to bring more of emotive light to that - so thanks.
Holy crap.....this is amazing. So freaking powerful, I feel like I've been punched in the gut. I would write a critique but it would basically just be 100 words of me repeating, "This amazing, beautiful, creepy and powerful." And there is only, oh so many ways I can write that over and over. Amazing job, seriously.
wow! This sounds like one of my dreams (only without all the screams of bloody murder) Good job on the poem. I love your style and yoour message! ALthough they may only be words they still have a lot of impact. SOmetimes words can be a matter of life or death. I think you really conveyed that and uncovered a deeper meaning.